From Beginner to Division I Golfer (3 of 3)

Generalization (future)

The final stage is referred to as the generalization stage. “Learners synthesize what they have learned with what they know and apply it to new contexts.” Of note for us as parents and coaches, players move up and down between the 3 stages of growth over time. Humans are not machines and we change on a daily basis at a cellular level. One could say we are not the same person day after day. 330 billion or 1% of our cells are replaced daily. In 80-100 days, all of our cells have been replaced and we are a ‘new’ person.

At times, Michael is in this 3rd stage, on autopilot and adapting what he’s learned to new courses, conditions, and competition. At times, he goes back into stage 2 and needs some guidance to sharpen something in his game that has gotten out of alignment. Players at the highest level go through the same cycle. That’s the importance of having a coach and team around you to help you. Michael learned early on the importance of a coach and he continues to this day to seek out help and coaching to help reach his potential.

Michael’s story could have had a different result.

I have observed countless players over the last 20 years who had as much talent as Michael or even more who did not reach the level of success that Michael has. Many of them quit the game entirely due to toxic environments that could have been avoided with some better golf programming and better decisions made by the Adults involved.

The Program

As a parent, please spend the time to research what program you are putting your child into. Ask questions, do a trial class, and observe what they do.

Traditional beginner golf programs are not great.

Lining up a beginner on the driving range, telling them all the things they are doing wrong in their swing, and then leaving them with a pile of golf balls to hit is not a recipe for success. They look around, see others having success hitting the ball high and far, and walk away wanting to do something else.

It’s weird to think about, but the traditional programs in golf avoid getting players on the golf course until they are ready. These programs don’t guide players into playing on the course, they leave that step to the player/family. In reality, playing on the course is what the program should be designed to do. Then, when they finish the program, they can participate in playing the game on their own and for a lifetime.

Picture a swimming class that never gets in the pool. They only work on their stroke on the deck of the pool each week and avoid getting in the water.

“Honey, do you need a towel to dry off after swim class? No Mom, we didn’t get in the pool.”

In defense of those who have walked before us:

The stewards of the game of golf are golf professionals.  They typically juggle many different hats throughout their working day while managing a golf course.  Creating a golf program designed for beginners is not on their normal list so they seek an easy solution.  The easy solution has been either a 1-1 private lesson or a one-time group clinic on the driving range.

The vision for the future is that golf professionals and parents see the evidence of positive outcomes such as the one told in this article and gravitate towards a program like Operation 36 at their facility.

The Adults

Don’t coach your child.  Don’t do it.  

Earl Woods, father of Tiger Woods and Richard Williams, father of Venus and Serena Williams are outliers amongst millions of children over the last 30-40 years.  

I’ve seen way too many children’s curiosity and passion for the sport of golf destroyed by a parent who takes it upon themselves to coach their children.  I am a golf professional of over 20 years and I defer the coaching of my kids in golf to someone else.

Your main role as a parent is to support and love your child no matter what outcomes they experience.  When you start coaching and giving feedback, you put your child in a position where the only approval they will get from you is when they win.  And it is natural for them to seek your approval and be proud of them.  

In golf, you only win a very small percentage of the time.  If you are their coach, they will only get your approval a few, if any, times a year….ouch.

From our statistics at Operation 36, if a player reaches a challenging Level, it will take around 20 attempts to score 36 or lower.  That means, 19 times, or 95% of the time, they are not experiencing the thrill of victory.  They are having very rich learning experiences that help them build the skills to beat 36.  How do you help your child find fun in the 95% so they can learn and not quit?

Michael’s Mom and Dad might give us some clues into what we should consider doing as parents.  Win, lose or draw, Michael’s Mom was always their at the end of an Operation 36 9-hole event to give him a hug.  Michael’s parents and grandparents attended all 149 9-hole events he played in, I can’t recall them not being present.  They would either walk on the cart path or drive a cart to support him.  Amazing dedication…

If he had a tough round, his Dad would come up to us and give us some clues as to what he saw.  He deferred the coaching to us and would routinely say, “I’m not a golf coach, I don’t know what to do, I’ll leave that up to you.”

His Grandfather would come up to me every few months and ask if Michael needs anything to help reach his goals.  Sometimes it was a new pair of golf shoes as he had outgrown what he had, other times it was getting fit for updated clubs or whatever he needed.  Michael had a fantastic support system.

Was Michael disappointed when he didn’t beat 36?  Absolutely.  Did his Mom and Dad feel the pain as well when he didn’t beat 36? Absolutely.  Did we as coaches feel it? Yes.  Their is no getting around that.

To his Mom and Dad’s credit, they leaned on the coaching staff to assist Michael and provided the love and support that only parents can provide.  They made the 95% as enjoyable as they could for Michael and then they celebrated in the 5%.  

For more information on parenting tips, please refer to, “How to Create a Junior Golfer,” a book we wrote in 2022 and will be updated later this year to the 2nd edition.  Chapter 9 is dedicated to the Role of Parents and provides some additional content to assist parents.  You can pick up a copy of this book at Amazon.

How to Create a Junior Golfer, by Ryan Dailey, PGA and Matt Reagan, PGA

Michael went from a beginner golfer in 2013 at the age of 6 to a top 2% golfer over the last 12 years.  

What can we learn to help future parents and players? Here are 5 takeaways having been in the ring with him for 12 years as his Coach:

1. It takes time to develop, make it fun every step of the way - As a Coach, you need to be able to adapt to make it fun for them at age 6, 12, 16 and every year in between.  If you don’t, they won’t stay in the game long enough to get good enough.  Fortunately, we had an Operation 36 program when he was younger to surround him with other kids doing the same thing.  That helped so much to make sure each and every class was fun.  1-1 private lessons in my experience don’t work that well with really young kids, get them in small groups.
   
   • At age 6, we were having water balloon fights at the golf course, hitting golf balls at pumpkins, dressing up for Halloween, and doing this with other kids his age.  We had a skill point store at the end of each year and he loved spending his skill point chips he earned throughout the year on candy, toys, and other fun things.
     
   • At age 12, I saw him 3-4 days a week during the season (Academy Class, Supervised practice, 9-hole event and occasional private lessons) and he was starting to show signs of wanting to be really good.  We would look at his results from Operation 36 9-hole events and adapt his training to that.  More often than not, that was about putting and improving his lag putting.  We would create different games together that he could play on his own and in class with others.  We moved him up to the High School class to have role models to look up to which was very helpful.  
     
   • At age 16, we aren’t having water balloon fights anymore.  Although, he still might enjoy that.  He does 1-1 private lessons and the frequency varies depending on the time of year.  He uses the winters to recharge, so I don’t see him much.  In the Spring/Summer, I might see him every few weeks.  We spend our time continuing to refine his swing pattern to tighten his ball dispersion.  He likes to play a small draw, so we use technology to give us information on his club and ball to make sure we are making the right adjustments.  He now assumes a large responsibility for his game and improving, I am more of a guide.  
     
2. The player has to fall in love with the game and have a burning desire to succeed no matter what - Michael got knocked down many times by the game of golf.  Many times he went home after a practice or tournament disappointed with how he performed.  He kept getting up and trying to improve.  Many others around him experienced the same thing and gave up.  Kudos to Michael, he’s a great role model for others to look up to in the years to come.
   
3. The parents matter more than we think - Reflecting on Michael’s journey, without his parents and grandparents, he would not have reached his goal of playing Division I golf.  The decision to live in the neighborhood at the golf course, driving him to countless events, providing for him financially, sacrificing family vacations for golf and there are countless other things we are not even aware of.  Without them, this would not have been possible.  
   
4. Continually push yourself as a coach to improve your skills, be humble, you don’t know everything - Michael pushed me to become a better coach.  As he improved and started to shoot lower and lower scores, I wanted to make sure I could help him.  I never wanted to hold him back.  That motivated me to attend quite a few continuing education events and spending time with coaches that have had this experience of developing players.  I was fortunate when I was younger to observe David Orr, PGA develop 2 very good junior players in our area.  Both of these players went on to play at Division I programs in college.  I would observe David teach them in lessons on a regular basis, making notes to help me when I would get that opportunity.  I had the opportunity to guide a few players prior to Michael that would accept college scholarships and it was the lessons from David and what I learned from the previous players that helped guiding Michael.
   • As Michael’s swing got better and better it was challenging for me as a coach to not see the same things based on my bias week in and week out.  I would send swings to David Orr, PGA tour coach Andy Plummer, and Champions Tour coach Michael Manavian to get a 2nd and 3rd opinion.  Their help has been priceless and I owe a lot of their help to Michael’s success.  
     
5. It takes more competition than we all think, a lot more - Michael’s story really gives us insight into quantifying how much on-course competition is needed to reach an elite level.  So many times, we see parents and players getting disappointed when they don’t beat 36 in 3 attempts.
   • Player - “Maybe golf isn’t for me?”  
   • Parent - “He just can’t putt, has no touch and maybe he needs to do something else.”
   • Hopefully, those who learn about Michael’s story can be the coach or parent who steps in and says, “You're doing great, you’ve tried this 3 times,  let’s keep plugging away and you’ll eventually figure this out.  Can I tell you a story about a player in North Carolina who was trying to achieve the same goals you are trying to achieve?”  Then, you can reference that it took him 22 attempts to beat Level 5 and 63 attempts to beat Level 7.

Conclusion:

We all need people in our corner who are supporting us and cheering us on as the road is full of bumps and potholes.  Michael’s story gives us as coaches and parents a reference point we can draw on to inspire our players.  I hope this gives you the motivation to support and cheer on your player.